God I miss you
I miss you every morning when you walk in to school with your swollen backpack.
I miss you every heavy nap you take without being in my own arms.
I miss you every time I can’t wipe your tears as you scrape your newly formed skin.
I miss you every time you try to force your growing arms in to your stubborn floaties.
I miss you every time you make a new friend and your courage doesn’t come from me.
I miss you like I’m missing a beat in my cardiac rhythm.You have become my insides. You walk with me attached in every decision I make. I see you in every shape of every cloud. Every flower I see, I feel the weight of you with me. I can hear your laughter in the sound of running water as I envision you running through it. I miss your heavy body and the pain of my stinging shoulder which is a sign that I was carrying you. I miss the scratches from you being clumsy and testing out your own strength. I just miss you.
I know that it’s time you take your fist steps in to the world.
I know that even though I get to spend my life with you, I’ll still spend my life missing you.
I know it’s time to let you fly.
But I miss you.
God I miss you.