GOD I MISS YOU

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God I miss you

 

I miss you every morning when you walk in to school with your swollen backpack.

 

I miss you every heavy nap you take without being in my own arms.

 

I miss you every time I can’t wipe your tears as you scrape your newly formed skin.

 

I miss you every time you try to force your growing arms in to your stubborn floaties.

 

I miss you every time you make a new friend and your courage doesn’t come from me.

 

I miss you like I’m missing a beat in my cardiac rhythm.You have become my insides. You walk with me attached in every decision I make. I see you in every shape of every cloud. Every flower I see, I feel the weight of you with me. I can hear your laughter in the sound of running water as I envision you running through it. I miss your heavy body and the pain of my stinging shoulder which is a sign that I was carrying you. I miss the scratches from you being clumsy and testing out your own strength. I just miss you.

 

I know that it’s time you take your fist steps in to the world.

 

I know that even though I get to spend my life with you, I’ll still spend my life missing you.

 

I know it’s time to let you fly.

 

But I miss you.

 

God I miss you.